Micky D's
by The 5 of Spades
Summary: This is why we can't go to McDonald's anymore! There's always one of the three little demons that manage to turn everything into some sort of trouble fest. "Why can't I have nuggets and a burger?" "For the last time, you only. Get. One. Choose, or I'll choose for you." "No! No, wait! Hm..."


Disclaimer: Insert standard disclaimer here.

D.W.'s Note: The thought of this makes me laugh.

"Mummy?" My five-year-old son gets my attention while he, Albus, and Lily are watching Yo Gabba Gabba on our newly acquired telly. The wonder in their faces at such a strange appliance was quickly overcome by a hypnotized stare. No wonder some people put their kids on schedules for this sort of thing... It looked unhealthy...

"Yes, James?" I acknowledge.

"Can we go to Micky D's for lunch?" McDonald's? Um. Hm. Well, I honestly couldn't remember the last time I had had McDonald's. I know Harry took me once. I suppose everything is good in moderation...

"Sure. But you have to get milk; no soda." He pouted, but nodded and walked back to his siblings to tell them the good news. They both looked confused, so I knew James was the only one who actually knew what McDonald's was.

I wish I had known what I was getting into when I agreed.

...

"And he already knew what it was?" Harry asked when we were driving up to park. I was not a fan of the Drive-Thru.

"Yeah; I guess Mione took him when he was over or something." He nodded and soon, we were all standing in line.

"Do you want chicken nuggets or a cheeseburger?" Harry asked Albus while holding his hand. Albus, bless his little heart, was actually sitting there and thinking about it.

"Can I haff someting ewse?" I sighed. This is about the only time I would ever be thankful for a long line.

"No, Al. You have to pick if you want a Kids Meal." Harry explained patiently.

"What if I don't wanna Kids Meal?" He cheeked. I gave him a look and he pouted. "Can I have apples?"

"Apples come _with _the Kids Meal. You have to choose chicken nuggets or a burger if you want the whole thing." I told him. James had asked for a burger; Lily wanted nuggets. Why was Albus being difficult?

"Mummy, I change my mind. Can I have nuggets instead?" I nodded to James and he looked uncomfortable for a second. Albus still looked thoughtful and there were only about four people left in front of us. "Nevermind, I want a burger still." I sighed and nodded again.

"Albus, you're getting chicken nuggets if you con't choose in the next twenty seconds." I told him sternly. Harry almost laughed at the look on the indecided boy's face.

"No! No! You can't choo _for _me! _I _ wanna choo! I choo..." Come on, Al. Choose _something. _Finally, his little face lit up, but he was looking at the menu. "I want the one in the picture!"

If I hadn't been holding Lily, I would have rubbed my face in my hands.

"No, Albus, you have to choose between the nuggets and the burger!" Harry was quietly laughing now, and I was starting to lose it. He furrowed his jet-black eyebrows.

"Can I have both?"

"Ugh! Fine, you're getting the nuggets." His eyebrows contracted further in petulant anger and he plopped down on the floor with his arms crossed. Harry sighed and picked him up, but he struggled.

"But I don't want the nuggets!" I ground my teeth together at the scene he was causing. Two people left in front of us.

"Well, which one do you want?!" He stopped struggling and stood there with his tiny fists balled. I sincerely hoped that no accidental magic would occur.

"Why can' a guy get what he want? I don't want nuggets or a burger!" I laughed despite the situation. He really was watching a lot of TV.

"Albus, I'll make a suggestion for you." I knew I had gotten his attention. Kids always wanted to be dealt with like adults. He leaned forward. "Why don't you get a _cheese_burger? It has cheese on it..." I left out the part that it was what came with the burger Kids Meal anyway. Harry raised an eyebrow at me, but I put a finger to my lips while Albus only took about five seconds to decide when he heard cheese. I do _not _know why he didn't hear me say it the first time...

"Deal!" Did I feel bad? Nope.

"Good." I said; and I meant it. We had finally reached the counter. Harry ordered for us, because while I could now understand the brightly colored and slightly disorganized muggle menus, the ordering was a process I didn't have enough patience to remember.

...

"Daddy, can you open my ketchup?" Harry took the small packet from James and opened it, handing it back. I engaged him back in the conversation we were having while trying to keep an eye on the little demons at the same time. Not an easy task, I assure you. I don't think I was doing a good enough job, because I turned around to check on them, and Al was gone.

"What the-? James, where is your brother?!" I got up to look for him, and Harry stood up and looked around also. I saw him talking to an elderly couple in the back.

"I'm so sorry!" I apologized, picking up Albus. "He gets away like that sometimes!" I laughed embarrassedly. They merely gave me kind smiles and assured me that Al was just a right dear. Right dear when he's not hungry, that is, I added mentally.

When I got back, Harry had taken away all of James' ketchup packets and was keeping them on his side of the table. He was holding a crying Lily and wiping the red sauce from James' face all at the same time.

"What happened?" I'm not sure I want to know.

"James?" Harry turned to James. The little boy pouted and made a grab for another ketchup packet. I smacked his hand away and put Albus back down in his seat. Jamie looked really sorry this time.

"I thought it was funny! 'Snot my fault she doesn't think blood is cooool." Okay, so, I pretty much understood why the ketchup was being kept away from him now.

"No ketchup for you." I scolded him. He pouted and threw a fry at Albus, who ducked and threw an apple slice right back at him. "Stop that, RIGHT NOW!" Thank goodness for my mother's lungs. They both stopped and continued eating. Harry was encouraging Lily to eat more of her apples. My poor baby will probably be scared of blood for the rest of her life...


End file.
